1904 – The Dawn of Hydration

“Though few remember her, Bessie K. Tannenbaum was the first American woman to tote a 64 oz wooden jug to a temperance rally. Locals scoffed. Her wrists suffered. But her kidneys thrived.”

1922 – The Cuppening

“In the wake of Prohibition, women smuggled ‘tea’ in bulky Liberty Tumblers — glass jars with patriotic slogans and straws long enough to double as self-defense.”

1943 – War-Time Sip Efforts

“Rosie the Riveter wasn’t just riveting. She was refilling. Factories issued industrial-sized canteens — ‘Victory Vessels’ — to cut breakroom congestion.”

1958 – Tupperware × Tumblers

“At an Ohio Tupperware party, a hostess poured three gallons of punch into one container and dubbed it a ‘Friendship Sip.’ Everyone blacked out. A tradition was born.”

1969 – Moon Sip

“NASA quietly tested a low-gravity 1-liter ‘Space Gulp’. Buzz Aldrin called it ‘the dumbest damn cup I’ve ever seen.’”

1983 – Aerobics & Aquanet

“Jazzercise instructors demanded nonstop hydration between grapevines. The ‘Hydro-Tone’ cup debuted: neon plastic, 96 oz, matching leg-warmers, straw with a built-in whistle so you could sip and holler ‘Feel the burn!’ without losing breath.”

1994 – Food-Court Flood

“Mall kiosks began offering free refills if you purchased the 128 oz ‘Mega-Mall Mug’. Teens lugged them from Orange Julius to Hot Topic, sloshing blue slushie over pagers and cargo shorts alike. Slushie tides ruined many a pager.”

2007 – Cubicle Colossus

“Corporate wellness rolled out the 144 oz ‘Synergy Stein’. HR loved it; IT hated the cucumber-mint keyboards.”

2012 – CrossFit Cantina

“Box gyms flexed with the half-gallon ‘PR Pitcher’. Time to beat? Finish it mid-burpee.”